Living and Creating Intentionally in the Midst of Coronavirus | Finding Space within the Space
How many times have we said “I would ______ if only I had the time.”
Well, maybe now you have a little extra time. Maybe now you’ve also got little ones around and extra demands and anxious thoughts that won’t stop spinning.
It’s not that we have to do something productive with this extra time we may have. It’s just that if there’s something you care about, something you want to do, something you feel called to, maybe this tragic time can be repurposed as opportunity.
Opportunity for the time we’ve wished we had to connect with our families. Opportunity to work on parenting with your spouse, together. Opportunity to learn something new (a million discounted or free course opportunities are out there right now). Opportunity to create: to write, to bake, to podcast, to work on whatever skill or craft we enjoy most. Opportunity to serve others well with the things we have or the things we create.
If this first week of social distancing had you panicked, anxious, volatile- join the club. You’re not alone. And I’m sure moving forward, these feelings will continue to join us. But they don’t have to own us.
Find help if you need it. Take meds if you need them. Meditate if you need to. Pray- I know I need to. But lets move forward and vow that when those feelings come up, we’ll do the best we can to not let them own us. Let’s do the best we can, this week, to create space for the good.
Because though we may have extra space right now, it seems that filling that space with the good, with what matters most to us, with the things we wish we’d have space for in our normal lives, will still take work. It’ll still take intention. It’ll still take carving out the space within the space.
So watch the writing training on the playroom floor while your kids play freely around you. Throw out the homeschool schedule and teach your kids through cooking together, through setting the table, through throwing a candlelit dinner and take that quality time you always wished you had more time for. Wake up 30 minutes earlier so you can read the book you’ve been wanting to read or learn through the course you’ve been wanting to take or create the thing you’ve been wanting to create.
In these anxious times, our new found space can so easily still be filled- by scrolling, by worrying, by watching the depressing headlines flash across the screen. Let’s limit that and fill the space with things that matter most.
Here are some steps to help.
Make your Quarentine Bucket List. Decide what it is you want space for. Both for you and for your family together. Be realistic to your current situation, but don’t dis count what is possible with a little practice. For example, maybe you have four kids running around but you want to learn through an online course. Maybe your husband isn’t home. But maybe you can put in an earbud and learn while you do the dishes, or maybe you can learn during naptime instead of scrolling.
This is just an example, but think of the space you have- and if you don’t see any, think of the space you can find if you say no to other things (like news headlines and scrolling and binge watching)
Work on new family routines around those things you’ve listed above, or new personal routines. While routines can help us keep anxiousness at bay, our old routines may not be working when our entire typical schedules have been uprooted. Schedule these new routines on the calendar. It is likely you’ve crossed off a lot of things on your calendar over the past week, so now it’s time to add what matters.
Establish coping mechanisms, because anxiousness and stress will absolutely take us away from what matters. Set time limits on screen time, ask for accountability from your spouse or roommate, or ask a friend/ family member to hold you accountable virtually.
Anxiousness has the ability to make us check out- I know this because I’ve done it a lot this past week. We have to do our best to remember that we have people we need to be strong for - and we need to be strong for ourselves. We need to remember that there can be growth in this situation if we focus on the feelings of safety and love and the good that can happen in this new found space.Follow through with a new routine for at least 5 days straight to the best of your ability. The beginnings of habit formation can start within 5 days, according to James Clear, and according to my friend Sarah who is really good at habits and routines. Ask for help. Commit to yourself and care for yourself so that you can be your best for your people. Do the best you can.
I know not all of us have this luxury to rest or find more space in our days right now. Thank you to the healthcare workers and grocery store workers and workers of all life-sustaining businesses that are keeping the world running and putting themselves at risk. I know my words may not apply to you, so I just want to say thank you.
I am personally on the side of forced space. And I don’t have advice the other way around because I’m not in it- but if you find yourself with more space as you are forced to stay home, I wanted to share these thoughts with you.
This first week was extremely hard for me, mentally and emotionally, as I processed what was going on. What I’ve realized is that there are no real answers except, for me, what I believe to be true: God has us amidst struggles and pain and fear and tragedy.
And so this week, I want to be better for my people and I want to be better for myself. I want to lean on the truth I believe, move forward, cope better and use my space for good.
Let’s create our new routines and let’s not let our new found space be filled with things that bring us down - but rather, as always, with what matters most to us.
RESOURCES YOU MIGHT WANT TO USE FOR LEARNING + CREATING
I mentioned that there are a million reduced or free courses out there right now, so I wanted to share a few that I am using:
Hope Writers - I’ve been a huge fan of Hope Writers for the past 6 months. I’ve tried a different writing trainings and online communities, and none have compared to Hope Writers. They’re putting out three free trainings each day this week, and I highly recommend checking them out!
Yale Course on Happiness - There’s a free course from Yale circulating the internet called The Science of Wellbeing, and of course I signed up for it immediately! I haven’t gone through it much yet, but here’s a link to find out more about it!
Podcaster’s Roadmap - Okay, I’m not personally using this course because it is one I created- but it is based off of everything I know about podcasting, and I was planning to officially launch it at normal price during this time. With the turn of events, I know it may be a great time to create content that helps people and put it out into the world in the form of a podcast, but also, I know finances can be tight. I’ve decided to put the course out into the world at a deeply discounted price to help anyone who may want to learn to create and grow a podcast, but doesn’t have the finances right now for a full priced course. Check it out here.
The Bright Side Conference - This is an affordable virtual conference that is based in optimism and positivity, self paced, and free for anyone struggling financially right now. It’s also free for health care workers and students.